


Bigger than a breadbox

by maybeillride



Category: Free!
Genre: 1950s-style pampering, Fantasizing, Future Fic, M/M, Tokyo (City), all are pretty dang handy, romance by 20 Questions, romance by UPS, romance by text, why do I love office-Rei???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-09
Updated: 2014-11-09
Packaged: 2018-02-24 17:12:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2589608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maybeillride/pseuds/maybeillride
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And that, as they say, was that. Nagisa hadn’t responded since and hadn’t answered when he called (repeatedly) and Rei feels like tearing his hair out, or his suit off, or heading back to the bathroom for the third time today. Is he being punished? Is this part of Nagisa’s little game?  Is it intended to turn him on?  Because it is, in a strange, strangled, violent and crazy sort of way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bigger than a breadbox

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).
  * Inspired by [So happy I could die](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2501459) by [maybeillride](https://archiveofourown.org/users/maybeillride/pseuds/maybeillride). 



> Hi all! Welcome to another domestic ReiGisa fic, flowing from an earlier story by me but purely existing because of one utterly fabulous soul. And so, this is dedicated to the-one-the-only zankyounofuckyou, who welcomed me here with such enthusiasm it was unreal and is basically Nagisa in comment-form (I liberally (mis-)appropriated little touches of her style for Nagisa's texts ;)). A few more thoughts to come in the end-note - but for now, please enjoy!

Rei’s trouble starts with Nagisa’s phone call at 10:30.

He’s in the zone, four spreadsheets side-by-side across his two oversized monitors telling a convoluted story that would totally confuse basically any other human being but that he’s getting a sort of nameless satisfaction out of untangling. They’ve been steadily bleeding money all year and no one can figure out why, and Rei has the hallmark buzzing/tingling at the base of his skull that alerts him he may be onto something. He blindly reaches for the energy bar next to his phone to take another bite, and reflexively jerks his hand away when the phone goes off instead. The caller ID shows Nagisa’s number and he feels the little ping that always accompanies his calls.

“Nagisa! You scared me – I was concentrating so much I jumped about a foot when you rang. I’ll bet I looked like poor Makoto.” He’s smiling into the receiver, careful to keep his voice pitched down to not bother Funikoshi-san next door.

“Ha! We have got SO much mileage out of him, huh? When are we all going on that Haunted Tokyo tour?? Hafta warn Haru to wear something with wrinkle-guard.” He laughs, his lovely, tinkling laugh that always magically makes the 30-year-old man sound about eight, but in a good, beautiful, and not creepy way. Rei doesn’t swing that way, thank-you-very-much. And my god, he is now officially out of the zone and he leans away from the monitor with a tiny sigh. He can’t remember his last break from the monitors so maybe it’s not a bad thing; he doesn’t want to work his back into a knot.

Nagisa’s reading his mind in a way Makoto and Haruka would probably find unimpressive but that has become a thing for them too. “So, sweets, when’d you last take a break, huh? You _know_ how you get when you concentrate too hard and pretty soon it’s the end of the day and security has to wheel you out. That is so not good for you! So I’m here to help, um, save you from yourself today.”

“Bored already on our day off, are we?” He smiles fondly as he gingerly stands, hearing pops from the middle of his back all the way down as he stretches. “Nagisa-kun, I thought you were going shopping today? Lounging in bed too tempting, hmmm?”

That laugh again. He feels an unexpected but not unwelcome stirring in his suit pants. “Well, interesting choice of words, dear. Okay.” He hears the shifting of blankets on the other end and is suddenly, weirdly homesick, that he’s stuck in this suit on the other side of town and not having this conversation between their flannel sheets (Nagisa’s requirement against the bite in the fall air). “You know those old ‘50s movies and books telling women how to take care of their husbands? Have a highball, slippers, the evening paper ready for them when they drag their ass home at night? Don’t bug them while they get a nice dinner ready?” They’re both sorta-experts on all things 1950s-kitch, partly from a fondness for bad Japanese monster movies of the era (Nagisa enthusiastic, Rei indulgent), partly from being gay men and being weirdly fascinated and disturbed by what _could’ve_ been for them had they been born too early.

“Much as I hate to derail your ramrod-straight train of thought, I must ask what the hell you’re talking about.” His anger is totally manufactured through a big smile he knows Nagisa can’t see.

“So MEAN, Rei-chan. Well we were in a lull at work and laughing about that, and the girls were totally teasing me saying ‘Oh, you probably take all kinds of care of that hot husband of yours, what a lucky guy,’ and then, I realized.” There’s a suspiciously long pause as Rei hears blankets rustling again.

“…Nagisa?”

His voice is a half-register lower and weirdly thick when it comes back. “…I _realized,_ no, I don’t. I really don’t take care of you like a ‘wife’ should. And, you so deserve to be taken care of! So that stops TODAY.”

Rei’s heart leaps into his throat at the obvious if suppressed pain in his love’s voice. How preposterous! “Nagisa!” he hisses, forgetting for a moment about keeping it down for Funikoshi. “Don’t be absurd, no one is a better caretaker than you! No one shows how much they care like you, no one checks in like you and makes sure I’m not working myself to death, no one knows what I love like you, no one gives me something to look forward to like you! Just…stop it.” He sits down in his chair again, surprised how upset he is all of a sudden. “…And besides, the 1950s were a cesspool of sexist propaganda and nothing to emulate.”

He’s rewarded by a genuine snorty chuckle from the other end and immediately feels better. He smiles and fusses with the phone cord. “WELL, Mr. Inspirational-Speaker, that was very sweet. But getting back to my original point, TODAY is the day you are _properly_ taken care of. I just got a, um, little something special from UPS and am going to use it to spoil you rotten when you get home.”

“Oh…?” He walks right into Nagisa’s trap. He can’t help it! He has a brain built for figuring out puzzles and this is made for him. “What, uh, little something are we talking about –”

He’s interrupted by a sharp rap on his open door and glances at the time on his phone display. 11:00 – _really?_ He’s been chatting/flirting with Nagisa for a half-hour? He looks back to the door a little guiltily and sees Funikoshi hanging in, smirking like they’re in on a joke together, and he’s about to apologize profusely for being so loud when he suddenly remembers their 11:00.

“Oh, thank you for the reminder, I completely lost track of the time! Thank you! I’ll be right in!” he says fervently with his hand cupped over the mouthpiece.

“Oh, I’d forget the time with THAT at home too,” his colleague says cheekily before disappearing from his doorway. Rei feels himself flush and hears giggling through the phone as he hastily returns to their conversation. “I have to go – I’ll text you, alright?”

“Yes, sir,” he hears through the giggling, before Nagisa hangs up.

*

**Received:** _How bout 20 Questions? Rei-chan needs something to get him thru the BORING mtg, right?? bingo! I can help, Nagisa only wants to help_ ◕ฺ‿◕

Rei glances up furtively from his seat in the very back of the conference room, feeling weirdly for a moment like everyone else in the meeting also has received Nagisa’s message, maybe telepathically. Of course no one suspects, staring forward at Michibata-san as he delivers their monthly sales update in his weirdly stabbing delivery or sneaking looks at their hidden Blackberries like he’s doing. He returns to his lap.

**Sent:** _I highly doubt your premise. But yes, this meeting is so dull it may kill me. OK…is it bigger than a breadbox?_ May as well start with a classic question and an obvious one too. If Nagisa is springing some new sex-toy on him he seriously doubts the answer will be yes. His Blackberry buzzes almost immediately – Nagisa’s texting skills never fail to amaze him.

**Received:** _hahah starting w an old chestnut are we sweetie – u are just SO u *happy panda noises*_

Rei doesn’t know if he should be insulted or not but he accidentally snorts at his phone anyway, then hastily does some cover-up coughing as a few heads turn curiously back. Heart pounding, he fakes interest in the front of the room for five minutes then looks back down to find another message.

**Received:** _ok. YES: it IS bigger than a breadbox, you oldie *ding ding ding* 19 left!_

He stares. He just stares at the little screen for ten full minutes as Michibata-san keeps assaulting the front of the room and Funikoshi discreetly reaches over and doodles their unfortunate speaker at a podium with a Hitler mustache, gesturing wildly, in Rei’s notebook margin. His neighbor does keep things interesting, if borderline-inappropriate. The relieved shifting of folders and chairs are the only thing cuing Rei the meeting is over and he snaps up, closing his notebook in a sort of text-induced trance.

“Damn, Ryuugazaki. What’s so hot you don’t even react to my fabulous art? When I do it especially _for_ _you.”_ He flutters his lashes dramatically as they file out, and Rei rolls his eyes back.

“Oh, please. You just have a disorder and you know it, if I wasn’t next door you would torment the next guy.” Neatly sidestepped, he congratulates himself. He beelines for the kitchen and Funikoshi paces him.

“No way! You and me, we have a _thing._ And you know it. Hey, when are we hitting the bars after work, huh? I have got to see you let that hair down.” He leans on the counter as Rei busies himself with finding his bento and energy drink in the depths of the fridge. Funikoshi sometimes makes his heart beat nervously and when he gets like this he knows to politely extract himself. “Hey, and bring your little blond. Seriously, we could have a great time! You wanna eat together?”

Rei is already heading back to his office. “Ah, no, sorry – still trying to figure out that Mitsubishi thing. I won’t rest until I do.”

Funikoshi sighs. “You work too damn hard, guy. Don’t kill yourself!”

He’s just waving a little bit over one shoulder as he rounds the corner.

*

Safely shut-up in his office with the bento invitingly open on his desk and a fresh burst of energy from his drink coursing through his veins, he leans back in his chair and finds another impatient note.

**Received:** _*panda…noises…*??_

That gets a full burst of laughter. He honestly has no idea what Nagisa’s talking about half of the time but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love it.

**Draft:** _Alright, alright, dear, I’m back. Sorry! Hmm, OK…is it…new roleplaying costumes?_

He pauses, mouth open a little at the thought. They haven’t done that in a long time and he’s surprised at the stab of want that gets him. Nagisa just looks so…GOOD in costume. Any kind. He snatches the phone from his lap again as he furiously adds onto his message.

**Sent:** _...schoolgirl? Trapeze artist? Cat burglar? Pirate? Speed Racer? :P_

The emoticon isn’t like him but the last image tickles him so much he can’t help it. Nagisa would be such a perfect plucky anime hero, and he would deserve something sleek and petite like one of those jumpsuit/helmet combos, ready for action…

Rei is drooling. Just a little.

His Blackberry buzzes. _ohhhh MY, those are some hot ideas_ *_* _!! I’m so sorry but NO T_T. 18 left…._

**Sent:** _OK….although I must say we should really think about that! I don’t know what is stopping us._ He smiles as he sends, popping a cucumber roll in his mouth but not tasting it.

**Received:** _noted. Now chopchop, big guy ;DDD_

**Sent:** _Ha, you! OK…a sex swing…?_ The image that greets this one is almost too much to take, both strangely innocent and beyond filthy. Nagisa on his lap, in their bedroom, on a contraption suspended from the ceiling, stretching higher and higher with each stroke upward, coated in sweat, Nagisa’s hands gripping his with surprising strength on the nylon ropes, their long swimmer thigh muscles reaching and _reaching_ …

Nagisa’s reply interrupts his fantasy and he’s alarmed to find he’s already half-hard. _um. Wow, Rei-chan. I wish I had asked you for ideas first! Hahahah, no, wrong, sorry, but I still luv u <3… 17 left!_

Rei pops his chair forward, frowning.

**Sent:** _Full set of bondage gear with ceiling hook-up._ He’s bluffing. They’ve never particularly been into restraints, which now that he thinks about it is sort of odd. Why not?? He’s flat on his back on the bed, nude, spread-eagle with strong arms straining futilely against their bonds, legs high in the air and held open mercilessly with a spreader, hamstrings twitching in anticipation. And Nagisa is kneeling at the foot of the bed in a neat, trim, sleek black suit, a rose-colored silk tie making his eyes shimmer, radiating calm authority and satisfaction, and his small hands gently smooth down the insides of both legs toward Rei’s crotch. He leans deeply forward, searching Rei’s face, whispering “…what do you want, baby?”

Rei stands up abruptly and heads for the bathroom.

*

He’s stuck in another meeting, this one a late-afternoon brainstorming session with his team, and he is so finished, so _done,_ it is absolutely clear to everyone in the room. They awkwardly soldier on, badly missing his usual energetic input, as he scowls down at his Blackberry. He scrolls through his message history again for some kind of clue.

**Received:** _OOOOOO rei-chan!!! O____O bondage gear, omg why o why did I leave you out of this?? STUPIDEST DAMN DESISION I’VE MADE ALL YR_ ^_^!!!! _16 and counting…. (omg I’m loving this so much, not sure if you can tell…)_

**Sent:** _Nagisa, you really don’t know what this is doing to me. I had to, uh, *excuse myself* after that last message. Can we just quit and get to the answer please??_ He hated being so weak but couldn’t help himself.

**Received:** _NEVER GIVE UP NEVER SURRENDER! o, and 16 *wink*_

**Sent:** _Riding crop/whip giftset!!_ That had been another bluff. If they strangely hadn’t done much bondage they’d basically only dipped their toes in S/M, limited to the odd spanking when the mood arose. Their bond was so affectionate and he felt so fiercely protective of Nagisa, felt such distress when he accidently caused him pain, he simply could never understand the mechanics of doing so on purpose.

**Received:** …… _what are u trying to TELL me, rei-chan? Hmmm…? And, nope. 15 ;)))_

**Sent:** _FULL TRACTION BED! Dammit Nagisa! What what what???_

**Received:** _And you are officically WAY more kinky then I EVER gave u credit for. I feel bad!! All this wasted tiiiime, Rei-chan. NOPE, 14._

**Received:** _oh! Gotta go, sorry! C ya tonite when u get home. I’ll be waiting 4 u <333333_

**Sent:** _Nagisa? Come on, this isn’t funny._

**Sent:** _Nagisa! Really – don’t leave me hanging like this (see, you’re making me make terrible jokes, come on, you don’t want that, do you??)_

**Sent:** _….Nagisa???_

And that, as they say, was that. Nagisa hadn’t responded since and hadn’t answered when he called (repeatedly) and Rei feels like tearing his hair out, or his suit off, or heading back to the bathroom for the _third_ time today. Is he being punished? Is this part of Nagisa’s little game? Is it intended to turn him on? Because it is, in a strange, strangled, violent and crazy sort of way. He growls down at the phone.

It’s a testament to the deep reserves of goodwill he’s built-up at work that his team glances at each other with genuine concern, breaking the session off awkwardly. His marketing lead gently pats his shoulder and closes his blank notebook for him. “Just go home, Ryuugazaki-san. We understand, dear,” she tells him softly so the endearment isn’t quite as obvious. It’s a testament to how out of his mind he is that he stands up and does just that.

*

“Nagisa???” He bursts in the apartment like something out of a bad melodrama or horror movie, barely remembering to paw the door shut behind him. The train ride home had been excruciating – Nagisa still hadn’t answered a single call or text in a string that had become increasingly frantic, and strangely his hard-on hadn’t wilted and had rather been joined by a tension coiled through his entire body. Worst-case scenarios spun through his brain and creepily, all had an erotic bent – Nagisa stepping out on him with some nameless hottie after getting called into work and crying out his pleasure from a supply closet, Nagisa interrupted by an impromptu visit from Haruka and being lowered gently into the depths of their overstuffed couch under their attractive friend’s weird spell, Nagisa happily returning home from the conbini and getting pulled into an alley by a gang of hyper-muscled thugs, forcing him to his knees and pulling out their straining cocks –

“NAGISA!!” He’s full-on screaming now as he finds the living room empty, rational super-ego Rei-mind horrified to find it is completely overwhelmed by the crazy-id Rei-mind he struggles to manage on the best of days. Then he hears it, from the bedroom, and almost passes out from the gush of relief.

“…in here, lover.” Cooed. Actually _cooed._

He storms into the bedroom, throwing the door open so hard it bounces off the wall, and just blinks at the sight.

The room is lit with such dramatic contrast it’s like a shrine, or Catholic church side-alcove. It’s completely dark except for the dozens of tealight candles in glass votive holders, arranged on each bedside table and along their windowsills, casting warm little discs of light that blend into a glow surrounding the bed. Where, he finds the bed immaculately made, and nestled in the nest of their ridiculous number of pillows (Nagisa is a pillow-whore), his man, looking positively resplendent from the neck-up.

From the neck-down, zipped into….something. Fuzzy, and…purple?

“Um,” he says. “Um, what.”

“It’s a Snuggie!” Nagisa bursts out, _beaming._ He worms his – bare, creamy-white – arms out from the top of the thing and holds them out wide. Rei drops his bag at the door and wanders to the bedside, feeling about as confused and overwhelmed by everything as he can remember. In recent memory, anyway.

“A Snuggie! They’re a huge campy thing in the U.S. – they’re basically blankets, that are super-comfy, and are socially acceptable to _zip yourself into._ And like, wear around! Can you believe I didn’t invent this? Is the world awesome or what? Aaaaand –” He snags the pocket of Rei’s overcoat and drags him over, and Rei lands across him, breathless. “- they _finally_ came out with one made for two people. So, basically…” He cups Rei’s cheeks and eyes him with what seems like supreme satisfaction. “We. Are going. To live in this thing. With occasional breaks for necessities like the bathroom and, hmm, the odd trip out dancing.”

“Oh, so, we’re quitting our jobs, now?” He’s smiling, stupidly, and realizes what a total idiot he is for this man’s love, he isn’t even tempted to lay into him for the torture he’s essentially been in for the last, oh, six hours. He’s just too damn happy to see him, safe and so adorable tucked into what is basically his ideal habitat.

“That’s what the digital revolution has done for us, Rei-chan!! Working…from… _home!_ Can you just imagine it?” And in a crazy way, he knows Nagisa is 100% serious, that if he could, he would be in bliss doing something from their cozy apartment with his husband, what being immaterial. Part of him would miss his beloved work buddies, but he would be totally content building something new together. Preferably in that ridiculous Snuggie. And Rei knows he would happily join him, in a heartbeat. Which is simply crazy.

“And THIS is the wild new sex toy that’s ‘bigger than a breadbox,’ is it?”

“…well it IS that big, right?”

“Well, yes –”

“And while _I_ never said it was a ‘wild new sex toy,’ I DID promise some heavy pampering, didn’t I?”

“- yes, you did.” And he’s almost embarrassed at the sudden flush in his cheeks, after this long together. Nagisa just smiles, sweetly, and runs his hands through Rei’s hair.

“Well, I’m a man of my word. Mr. Ryuugazaki, please remove that suit.”

Rei is out of his coat and suit as fast as (faster than?) Haruka at the pool, and while he wonders if he maybe should’ve drawn it out to provide a little show for his man, Nagisa looks plenty appreciative to see him in all his aroused glory. This time when he reaches out to pull him back to the bed, it’s a lot gentler, and it isn’t by his pocket.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, there you have it - over 3000 words and all the action *still ends up in Rei's head* (or hand, as it were). Gahhhh Nira-chan, I am SO sorry, I sincerely hope you don't feel you've been stiffed (*waaa-waaaah*). However, the inspiration for this story really was your affection for the very IDEA of Nagisa all wrapped up in coziness - and better yet, in a 2-person Snuggie (that *you looked up* to make sure exists...I swear, I just have to bite the bullet and put you on as a co-author) with his Rei-chan. Really, why would he leave? 
> 
> And the story became more about the unique safety and warmth between Rei and Nagisa - that even when his shota husband mercilessly torments him, like in this fic, their relationship gives them the coziness of basically walking around 24/7 in a 2-person invisible Snuggie. And, ya know, occasionally getting into said Snuggie for cuddles and some hot pampering.
> 
> Anyhoo, not to hammer a metaphor into the dirt, but zank, YOU provide the same cozy kindness here. THank you for being so sweet <3


End file.
